Family and Friend Relationships
- Who are your friends?
- What quality/qualities do you value most in your friends?
- Are any of your friends completely opposite to you or are most of them similar to you?
- Do you make friends easily or do you find it difficult to make new friends?
- What are the most common reasons for friendships to fall apart?
- Who is your strangest friend? What makes them strange?
- What separates true friends from acquaintances?
- What is the best part of being a part of your family?
- Who is the first person you call when you have a bad day?
- Who in your family are you most like? Who takes care of the family the most?
- Do you like going to family gatherings? Why or why not? What is your favorite family tradition?
- How important are strong family ties to you? Are strong family ties more or less important that close friendships?
- Who is the most interesting person in your extended family?
- When your parents argue – who do you side with normally?
- What’s a good barometer for a friend being a good friend? Someone you’re fine with taking care of your house and driving your car? Wouldn’t let you drive my car but I’d let you push it, or put a hitch on it and pull it.
- Childhood –
- How would you change how you were raised?
- Fave memories of growing up? What was it like?
- What were you like as a kid? Shy? Outgoing? Imaginative?
- Do you feel like you were moreso a kid who’s forced to be an adult, or always trying to be an adult and now you want to be a kid, or you were always living your age?
- Where were you at recess? Climbing trees, monkey bars / jungle gym, on the swings, reading a book, or sport (soccer/bball)?
Personality / Psychology / Social Situations
- Do you enjoy hosting people?
- Do you moreso enjoy hanging with people one on one or in groups?
- What inspires you the most in life? Other peoples’ stories? Your imagination? Competition? Beauty/aesthetic visuals? Having new experiences? Other people’s support for you?
- What’s your reason for getting out of the bed in the morning?
- What do you live for? Live for others? Success/fulfillment through work? Bringing other people joy?
- What do you find yourself thinking about the most throughout the day?
- How do you show appreciation for the people and influences who have made you who you are? Do you let them know about the difference they’ve made?
- Do you talk to yourself nicely or are you hard on yourself? (Are you your own best friend or worst critic?)
- Can a person change their personality? Are personalities more nature or nurture? How has your family shaped your personality and who you turned out to be? Theory of Positive Disintegration – psychological tension and anxiety as necessary for growth. Agree with that theory? Are we active or reactive in our development?
- What is your role in your friend group(s) usually? Leader? Follower? Idea person? Risk taker? Mother role (take care of everyone)? Make sure everyone is happy?
- What do you like and dislike about yourself? Personality trait do you wish you had?
- Are you over-encouraging of friends’ creative endeavors (i.e. art, fiction) or are you realistic?
- Do you think its true that a group’s activity planning depends on the person in the worst mood? And it’s usually the same negative person. Everyone’s worried about that person’s feelings. Or is it the most fun person?
- How awkward is a double goodbye? Long goodbye?
- What is your spirit animal? Spirit liquor?
- How do you see your personality? As a delicate flower? Bad a**? Or naughty vixen?
- What were your nicknames growing up?
- When you’re having a bad day, what do you do to make yourself feel better?
- Do you do dance when no one is looking? Are you more likely to sing in the shower or car?
- Deepest darkest fear?
- What’s something your brain tries to make you do and you have to will yourself not to do it? [IE what habits are the hardest to break for you]
- What do you do to alleviate stress?
- Have you shed more tears crying or laughing?
- Is it fair if you hold your dreams against someone?
- How early is it okay to be nostalgic about something?
- How can you tell that someone is successful without them telling you? Very happy? Sophisticated and serious? Funny? Good at small talk?
- Biggest impacting event on your life for your identity?
- What makes up who someone is the most, in your opinion? Activities/work you do? Your style/fashion? How you treat people around you? How you handle the tasks in your life?
- If there’s one article of clothing that makes a man or woman, what would it be?
- Would you rather you be completely yourself and not be liked or only show part of yourself to people and be liked?
- Which is more important – happiness or intelligence?
- What makes someone a “good” person?
- What’s weird about you?
- Are you sugar and spice or mostly sugar or mostly spice?
- When I order way too much food will you finish what I can’t eat?
- Do you prefer discussions or debates?
Romantic Relationships
- What type of people do you attract? Get along best with?
- What types of guys did you have crushes on? Types of celebrities, friends?
- What are your pet peeves? Would you be able to stay with someone if every time they drank a drink they slurped? Or smacked their lips? Or lightly tapped their lips to each other?
- Rank the importance of senses in a relationship
- What love language are you? Appreciate which the most (or rank them) – physical touch, gifts, words of encouragement, quality time (undivided attention), acts of service
- Personal love language version – Which do you most appreciate from a partner? Excitement, laughter, affection, or intellectual conversation.
- Are you a giver (give more than you receive) vs taker (take more) vs reciprocator (only give back as much as someone gives you)?
- Why did you break up with your last boyfriend or girlfriend? Amicable breakups?
- Most awkward date?
- First kiss?
- Gifts – Does presentation matter? Homemade card better than bought?
- Time spent together – how many dates a week?
- What quirks do you dislike? People who laugh at inappropriate times? Other Seinfeld quirks and nitpicks?
- What is your finest qualities in a relationship that make you stand out?
Romance
- What is the best part of a relationship? Being called pet names, cuddling, having your hair played with?
- In a relationship, would you rather give up cuddling, massages, hugs, or holding hands?
- What is a more romantic date – lionfish hunting, fish pedicure, or hot candle wax massage? Or seriously – picnic at the end of a hike, day of museum tours and dinner after, or ?
- Would you rather your man, if he had to vomit, be during the proposal or making his vows?
- What would the best proposal be like? Is the surprise factor the most important factor – i.e. while in the Chipotle line, in a dressing room, or while cleaning up a landfill?
- During the wedding, do you want your bridal party to wear trash bags as dresses so you look even more beautiful?
- If someone were to sweep you off your feet and take you to the place of your dreams, where would they take you?
- Most romantic gift: Collage, mix tape, flowers, chocolates or something else?
- Most romantic thing you can do together? Paris Eiffel tower, 3-legged race, paddle boating, Ferris wheel?
- Most romantic thing someone can do for another – not a back massage but un-peeling an orange or de-shelling a crab
- Do you believe in love at first sight? How about regarding dogs?
- Turn on or turn off – a guy being obsessed with lawnmowers and snowblowers?
- What would be the best food for lingerie to be made out of? Fruit roll-up? Steak? Cotton candy?
- Does saying “I love you” everyday lower the appreciation for it? ie nudism lowering how special it is to see them naked
- Should your clothes and your partner’s clothes match?
- Can true love only exist with reciprocation? I think yes love can be one sided but not true love.
- What’s the male equivalent of “put a ring on it”? Dig a man cave for him?
- What is the female equivalent of a “man cave”? A she shed? What would you have in it?
Relationship tests
- What are your deal-breakers? Examples:
- 1) Disliking kids – Understand disliking certain ages of kids, but it’s not ideal to hard dislike kids in general (especially if one wants to make a family).
- 2) Disliking spending time with family – Some people try to escape family and it’s not ideal!
- 3) People who burn bridges and hold grudges against friends, especially if they burn bridges with family (do not forgive people for wrongdoing or accept people who are different).
- 4) People obsessed with traveling as their favorite hobby or goal in life. While travel is good for opening your worldview, perspective, and inspire you, where is your ambition for excellence in your career and helping the world?
- 4) People saying they like pets (e.g. dogs, horses) more than people. It’s immature – it’s like a young sister who says she loves her dog more than her brother because her brother is mean sometimes. Grow up and learn how to get along with people better.
- 5) Disney World Obsession – People with this are weird, willing to visit every year How often would you be able to visit?
- What are your deal-makers?
Affection
- Would you rather your partner be an amazing cuddler, hugger, or masseuse?
- Are you more likely to lay your partner while reading a book in a park, cuddle with your partner while sleeping, or??
Romantic Observations or Sweet Sayings
- It’s interesting that early in life we believe we will connect with so many people, and later in life we realize we’ve only made a few very strong connections.
- “You make me thank god for every mistake I ever made, Because each one led me down the path that brought me to you.”
Quirks
- Get jealous when seeing people exercising
- “I am always 20% hungry so I always grocery shop while hungry.”